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07-16-2008, 21:29
| #1 (permalink) |
| Racy Ol' Lady   |  And Then The Fight Started... AND THEN THE FIGHT STARTED... When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... So, I took her to a gas station... And then the fight started.... ******************************************** My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' 'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started... ******************************************** I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it... He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!' So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?' And then the fight started ******************************************** After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.' And then the fight started...
__________________ "... when two or three are gathered in my name ..." - Join us in prayer. All faiths welcome (Click below) http://www.trackpads.com/forum/group...iscussion.html Who steals my purse steals trash ... ... But who filches from me my good name Robs me of that which not riches him, And makes me poor indeed. ~Shakespeare Life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death! Last edited by Snowden; 07-16-2008 at 21:32. |
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07-17-2008, 18:42
| #3 (permalink) |
| Icing Queen   | Re: And Then The Fight Started... 
__________________ Your memory is our keepsake, With which we'll never part. God has you in his keeping, We have you in our hearts. ~2004 winner of The Outreach Award ~2005 co-winner of The Bronze Button Award ~March 2006 Perv of the Month ~Sept 2006, Oct 2007 - MOTM ~2007 Oct-Dec MOTQ ~2007 Female Silver Raincoat Recipient ~2007 MOTY |
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07-19-2008, 10:29
| #5 (permalink) |
| Junior Officer   | Re: And Then The Fight Started... love em
__________________ War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself. John Stuart Mill (1806 - 1873) |
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