Go Back   Trackpads Community > General Discussions > Humor

Humor Jokes, Jokes and more Joke! Get an interesting one in the email? Share it!

Humor

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 09-30-2005, 15:17   #1 (permalink)
The Librarian
 
RAMESES the Great's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Gold Staff Service Medal Bronze Triva Medal Bronze Reputation  Medal Gold Vehicle ID Medal Gold Magazine Medal Silver Commanders Coin Army Service Button 2 Blue Star 
Total Awards: 11
My Mood
My Mood:
Status
RAMESES the Great is offline
Post Count
6,092
My Photos
My Photos: 8
Staff Title
Asst. SDIV Cdr
Member Flags
United States uk wales
My Referrals
My Referrals: 5
Reputation +/-
RAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to beholdRAMESES the Great is a splendid one to behold
Petz
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 24,314.13
Bank: 80,331.11
Total T-Bucks: 104,645.24
    

 
Default Sweet Revenge

*Subject:* Curtain Rods

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and stuffed half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar, into the hollow of all of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything: cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out . Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned, air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house. The maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the local Realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back. Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.............including the curtain rods.........

I JUST LOVE HAPPY ENDINGS, DON'T YOU
__________________
Inventor of Armored Warfare, RAMESES the Great, Victor, Battle of Kadesh, 1275 BC. King of Upper and Lower Egypt, "Don't believe that Hittite Propaganda, I was there!"
RAMESES the Great is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Trackpads Information
Click to Visit
Old 09-30-2005, 15:31   #2 (permalink)
unrepentant grunt
 
filthybeast's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Gold Staff Service Medal Gold Reputation Medal Silver Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Gold Donations Award Army Service Button Gold Community Medal Silver Threads Medal 
Total Awards: 9
My Mood
My Mood:
Status
filthybeast is offline
Post Count
34,240
My Photos
My Photos: 0
Staff Title
General Discussions Moderator
Member Flags
United States us california
My Referrals
My Referrals: 1
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
filthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant future
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 123,877.64
Bank: 13,710,972.05
Total T-Bucks: 13,834,849.69
     
     
     
    

 
Default Re: Sweet Revenge

Now thats funny.
__________________
Airborne, Ranger, Infantry All the way. Ambushes arranged on request. Inquire within.
(If your not INFANTRY your Support)!
filthybeast is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-30-2005, 22:23   #3 (permalink)
Icing Queen
 
conlor's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Silver Staff Service Medal Silver Reputation  Medal Gold Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Army Service Button Silver Community Medal 1 Blue Star 
Total Awards: 9
My Mood
Status
conlor is offline
Post Count
23,676
My Photos
My Photos: 1
Staff Title
EDIV Trivia Coordinator
Member Flags
United States Undisclosed
My Referrals
My Referrals: 1
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
conlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond repute
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 124,489.47
Bank: 42,891.45
Total T-Bucks: 167,380.92
     
     
 

 
Default Re: Sweet Revenge

!!!!!!!

Sorry, I mean, that was a lovely story!
__________________
Your memory is our keepsake, With which we'll never part. God has you in his keeping, We have you in our hearts.

~2004 winner of The Outreach Award
~2005 co-winner of The Bronze Button Award
~March 2006 Perv of the Month
~Sept 2006, Oct 2007 - MOTM
~2007 Oct-Dec MOTQ
~2007 Female Silver Raincoat Recipient
~2007 MOTY
conlor is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-30-2005, 23:36   #4 (permalink)
Monkey Mouse
 
Woodmonkey's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Gold Staff Service Medal Gold Reputation Medal Bronze Referrals Medal Bronze Magazine Medal Silver Gallery Medal Gold Donations Award Silver Donations Award 2 Blue Star 
Total Awards: 12
My Mood
My Mood:
Status
Woodmonkey is offline
Post Count
57,707
My Photos
My Photos: 108
Staff Title
Trackpads XO
Member Flags
United States us connecticut
My Referrals
My Referrals: 15
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
Woodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond repute
Petz
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 62,957.34
Bank: 1,214,683.76
Total T-Bucks: 1,277,641.10
     
     
     

 
Default Re: Sweet Revenge

I love it!!!
__________________
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How May I Help You?





PM me through this link if clicking on those banners doesn't help with your questions

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Woodmonkey is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Revenge of the Nerds conlor Humor 3 04-07-2007 13:00
Women's Revenge JudyLynne Humor 5 10-17-2006 19:50
Revenge Snowden Humor 3 03-02-2005 11:55
Woman's revenge las47032 Humor 1 10-20-2004 17:48
Revenge Really Is Sweet, Study Shows Forum Mouse News Articles 0 08-29-2004 22:00


Community Information
Options
Quick Options
Trackpads Non-Commercial Ad
Copyright Information Click to Visit
Time
Server Time
All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:10.
Copyright
Copyright Information
The header is based off of work by Vipixel.com and modified by this site. Trackpads and the Trackpads Logo are both Registered Trademarks of Jason Edwards and cannot be used without prior written permission.  The only exception is as a link back to this site. Trackpads is a private website run by a small legion of volunteers, 3 dogs, 12.5 cats and an army of small, super smart, bio-engineered mice with pointy hats and tutu's. Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.2.0 RC7
Archive Links
Archive Links
Page generated in 0.80340 seconds with 24 queries