Go Back   Trackpads Community > General Discussions > Humor

Humor Jokes, Jokes and more Joke! Get an interesting one in the email? Share it!

Humor

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 09-27-2005, 17:23   #1 (permalink)
Fallen Member
 
USA11B's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Navy Service Button Army Service Button Bronze Community Medal Bronze Threads Medal 
Total Awards: 4
My Mood
Status
USA11B is offline
Post Count
1,790
My Photos
My Photos: 0
Member Flags
United States Undisclosed
My Referrals
My Referrals: 0
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
USA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to allUSA11B is a name known to all
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 2,576.00
Bank: 0.00
Total T-Bucks: 2,576.00

 
Default A HORRIBLE story................

A HORRIBLE story................


Dear Husband:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.

I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.

These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you
had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came
home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your
favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.

You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.



P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving
away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Your EX-Wife



Dear Ex-Wife



Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that
you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far
cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your
constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off
all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look
just like a man!" My mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say
anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.

I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was
$49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the
filling life you always wanted.

My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from
me. So take care.



P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born
Carla. I hope that's not a problem.



Signed Rich As Hell and Free!
USA11B is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Trackpads Information
Click to Visit
Old 09-27-2005, 18:45   #2 (permalink)
Icing Queen
 
conlor's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Silver Staff Service Medal Silver Reputation  Medal Gold Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Army Service Button Silver Community Medal 1 Blue Star 
Total Awards: 9
My Mood
Status
conlor is online now
Post Count
23,669
My Photos
My Photos: 1
Staff Title
EDIV Trivia Coordinator
Member Flags
United States Undisclosed
My Referrals
My Referrals: 1
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
conlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond repute
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 124,029.17
Bank: 42,891.45
Total T-Bucks: 166,920.62
     
     
 

 
Default Re: A HORRIBLE story................

Oh, well! You win some, you lose some! Hopefully, Carla can cook!
__________________
Your memory is our keepsake, With which we'll never part. God has you in his keeping, We have you in our hearts.

~2004 winner of The Outreach Award
~2005 co-winner of The Bronze Button Award
~March 2006 Perv of the Month
~Sept 2006, Oct 2007 - MOTM
~2007 Oct-Dec MOTQ
~2007 Female Silver Raincoat Recipient
~2007 MOTY
conlor is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2005, 18:52   #3 (permalink)
Non-Commissioned Officer
 
cominatcha's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Bronze Reputation  Medal Army Service Button Bronze Community Medal 
Total Awards: 3
My Mood
Status
cominatcha is offline
Post Count
583
My Photos
My Photos: 7
Member Flags
United States us alabama
My Referrals
My Referrals: 0
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
cominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nicecominatcha is just really nice
Petz
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 2,966.00
Bank: 0.00
Total T-Bucks: 2,966.00

 
Default Re: A HORRIBLE story................

__________________
If You Can Read This ,Thank A Teacher ---- If It,s In English,Thank A Soldier............
cominatcha is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2005, 21:14   #4 (permalink)
Monkey Mouse
 
Woodmonkey's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Gold Staff Service Medal Gold Reputation Medal Bronze Referrals Medal Bronze Magazine Medal Silver Gallery Medal Gold Donations Award 2 Blue Star Silver Donations Award 
Total Awards: 12
My Mood
My Mood:
Status
Woodmonkey is offline
Post Count
57,687
My Photos
My Photos: 108
Staff Title
Trackpads XO
Member Flags
United States us connecticut
My Referrals
My Referrals: 15
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
Woodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond reputeWoodmonkey has a reputation beyond repute
Petz
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 62,227.44
Bank: 1,214,683.76
Total T-Bucks: 1,276,911.20
     
     
     

 
Default Re: A HORRIBLE story................

__________________
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How May I Help You?





PM me through this link if clicking on those banners doesn't help with your questions

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Woodmonkey is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2005, 23:47   #5 (permalink)
unrepentant grunt
 
filthybeast's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Gold Staff Service Medal Gold Reputation Medal Silver Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Gold Donations Award Army Service Button Gold Community Medal Silver Threads Medal 
Total Awards: 9
My Mood
My Mood:
Status
filthybeast is online now
Post Count
34,226
My Photos
My Photos: 0
Staff Title
General Discussions Moderator
Member Flags
United States us california
My Referrals
My Referrals: 1
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
filthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant futurefilthybeast has a brilliant future
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 123,760.68
Bank: 13,710,972.05
Total T-Bucks: 13,834,732.73
     
     
     
    

 
Default Re: A HORRIBLE story................

Sweet
__________________
Airborne, Ranger, Infantry All the way. Ambushes arranged on request. Inquire within.
(If your not INFANTRY your Support)!
filthybeast is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 10-15-2005, 16:46   #6 (permalink)
Non-Commissioned Officer
 
frosty0's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Bronze Reputation  Medal Air Force Service Button 
Total Awards: 2
My Mood
Status
frosty0 is offline
Post Count
371
My Photos
My Photos: 138
Member Flags
United States Undisclosed
My Referrals
My Referrals: 0
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
frosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura aboutfrosty0 has a spectacular aura about
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 588.00
Bank: 0.00
Total T-Bucks: 588.00

 
Default Re: A HORRIBLE story................

Now that's justice.
frosty0 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 10-19-2005, 21:34   #7 (permalink)
QUEEN OF THE BEASTS
 
JudyLynne's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Silver Reputation  Medal Bronze Reputation  Medal Silver Donations Award Bronze Community Medal Bronze Threads Medal 
Total Awards: 5
My Mood
Status
JudyLynne is offline
Post Count
1,726
My Photos
My Photos: 1
Member Flags
United States us texas
My Referrals
My Referrals: 0
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
JudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to beholdJudyLynne is a splendid one to behold
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 3,718.00
Bank: 0.00
Total T-Bucks: 3,718.00

 
Default Re: A HORRIBLE story................

Surprise
JudyLynne is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Story behind the story: The Clinton myth leobold1 Politics 0 03-21-2008 16:05
Story Thread........A Mystery Story Woodmonkey Games/Quizzes 166 10-18-2005 09:09
Cracking a Horrible Code Woodmonkey Point/Counterpoint 2 06-24-2005 01:34
[News Feed] Schiavo Parents to Supreme Court: Stop 'Horrible Death' Forum Mouse News Articles 0 03-24-2005 04:00
[News Feed] 'Horrible Lapse' Costs Davenport Title (AP) Forum Mouse News Articles 0 01-29-2005 22:00


Community Information