Go Back   Trackpads Community > General Discussions > Humor

Humor Jokes, Jokes and more Joke! Get an interesting one in the email? Share it!

Humor

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 03-10-2005, 01:39   #1 (permalink)
Enlisted Warrior
My Awards Rack
Total Awards:
My Mood
Status
drs84 is offline
Post Count
185
My Photos
My Photos: 0
Member Flags
United States
My Referrals
My Referrals: 0
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
drs84 is on a distinguished roaddrs84 is on a distinguished roaddrs84 is on a distinguished road
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 466.00
Bank: 0.00
Total T-Bucks: 466.00

 
Default Speeding Marine

One day a police officer clocked a car driven by a marine at over 90 miles per hour. The marine, one of our older military veterans of three wars, immediately pulled over once he saw the blinking lights of the black and white Dudley Do-right on his bumper.

Marine: Hi officer. Did I do anything wrong?

Officer: Sir I clocked you at 90 miles per hour. May I see your license please?

Marine: Naw that aint possible. I lost my license when I was charged with the DUI about 4 years back.

Officer: I see. The can I see your registration?

Marine: No that won’t be possible either. See this is a stolen car.

Officer: stolen car?

Marine. Yep. The guy i stole it from is in the trunk.

Officer: he's in the trunk?

Marine: yep. Bopped him on the head, cut him up into a hundred pieces, put em in plastic bags and popped him right into the trunk. You want to see him?

Officer: no. You just stay in the car. The officer goes back to his car.

Five minutes later, five police cars roll up and surround the vehicle. The police captain strolls up to the car, with a drawn gun.

Captain: Sir, would you mind getting out of your car?

Marine: Sure sir. And he gets out

Captain: sir I just received a report from one of my men that he had just apprehended a driver without a license. Do you have a license to drive sir?

Marine sure do and pulls out his driver license from his wallet.

Captain: I also received word that the man was driving a stolen car, with possibly a body in the trunk. Is this the case?

Marine: Naw sir, this is my car. He pulls the registration out of the glove compartment, and hands it to the captain.

Captain: would you mind opening your trunk?

Marine: sure sir. He then opened the trunk to reveal...nothing.

Captain: I am very puzzled. My man reported that he had apprehended an unlicensed driver, driving a stolen car, with a body in the trunk. None of that seems to be true.

Marine: yeah, and I bet the little liar even told you I was speeding didn’t he?
drs84 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Trackpads Information
Click to Visit
Old 03-10-2005, 06:07   #2 (permalink)
Pending User
My Awards Rack
Total Awards:
My Mood
Status
USMC5831 is offline
Post Count
9,298
My Photos
My Photos: 0
Member Flags
Undisclosed
My Referrals
My Referrals: 1
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
USMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to allUSMC5831 is a name known to all
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 27,632.00
Bank: 0.00
Total T-Bucks: 27,632.00

 
Default Re: Speeding Marine

ROFLMAO I got to try that.
USMC5831 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 03-11-2005, 21:11   #3 (permalink)
Icing Queen
 
conlor's Avatar
My Awards Rack
Silver Staff Service Medal Silver Reputation  Medal Gold Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Silver Commanders Coin Army Service Button Silver Community Medal 1 Blue Star 
Total Awards: 9
My Mood
Status
conlor is offline
Post Count
23,986
My Photos
My Photos: 1
Staff Title
EDIV Trivia Coordinator
Member Flags
United States Undisclosed
My Referrals
My Referrals: 1
Personal Guestbook
Reputation +/-
conlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond reputeconlor has a reputation beyond repute
Other Swag
T-Bucks: 182,246.02
Bank: 47,355.63
Total T-Bucks: 229,601.65
     
     
 

 
Default Re: Speeding Marine

Funny!!!! Better not, Chris. They might've seen this joke by then.
__________________
Your memory is our keepsake, With which we'll never part. God has you in his keeping, We have you in our hearts.

~2004 winner of The Outreach Award
~2005 co-winner of The Bronze Button Award
~March 2006 Perv of the Month
~Sept 2006, Oct 2007 - MOTM
~2007 Oct-Dec MOTQ
~2007 Female Silver Raincoat Recipient
~2007 MOTY
conlor is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Top This for a Speeding Ticket ptco911 Humor 9 12-03-2007 11:13
How to avoid a speeding ticket - II JohnRN Chit-Chat 2 03-16-2006 08:57
How to avoid a speeding ticket... JohnRN Chit-Chat 4 01-13-2006 02:25
Speeding penalties. Ryan Cooper Auto Racing 9 09-12-2005 04:00
How to tell your speeding MACTANK Humor 3 08-27-2005 10:00


Community Information
Options
Quick Options
Trackpads Non-Commercial Ad
Copyright Information Click to Visit
Time
Server Time
All times are GMT -4. The time now is 23:18.
Copyright
Copyright Information
The header is based off of work by Vipixel.com and modified by this site. Trackpads and the Trackpads Logo are both Registered Trademarks of Jason Edwards and cannot be used without prior written permission.  The only exception is as a link back to this site. Trackpads is a private website run by a small legion of volunteers, 3 dogs, 12.5 cats and an army of small, super smart, bio-engineered mice with pointy hats and tutu's. Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.2.0 RC7
Archive Links
Archive Links
Page generated in 0.56241 seconds with 23 queries