PT Ladies Vs Filthybeast

[filthybeast]

As most of you know I have to go to PT several times a week. I call the joint Helga's house of PAIN. ( There are no Helga's there just so you know ). I have a rep there and we battle over all kinds of stuff. Well today I show up and they got a new Lady so they assign her to me. She is a young thing very nice looking, but well she really takes the rules to heart. First she takes my box of Do-Nuts and says to me you cannot eat these. She then takes the Cigar out of my shirt pocket and asks what is this for. I tell her I keep it there in the hopes that someday one of you Ladies will want to Play Bill & Monica with me. She is not impressed.
She lectures me on what I can and cannot do. I ask her if she wants to go get a Brew after we are done today I explain that my Wife rents me out from time to time. She just narrows her eyes and we start our session. ( This is the part I like because I get a Massage also meaning I have to strip ).
I got this towel wrapped around me and she tells me to hop on the table. She beging moving my arms and legs around and then has me do the regular stuff before the Massage. She starts the massage and asks me where I got all the scars. I tell her that my students used to get P/Oed when I posted grades and I dont run faster than they do. She now figures out that I am crazy. ( Most people find out quicker ). She askes me where I teach I told her I used to teach at UCLA but because of this ticker of mine I am now doing the retired bit. She asked me how I got into teaching I told her after I retired from active duty, it seemed a easy way to meet young chicks. She threw up her hands and left the room. Jane one of the PT ladies I have known for a few years comes in and finishes me up. She is telling me that the rookie was out in the hall telling all the ladies that I was some kind of perverted nut job. I laughed and Jane tells me to go shower up as we are done. I go out into the hall and back to the front office. This little gal is there and looks at me shaking her head ( One of the other ladies ratted me out and now she knows I am just an old softy at heart ).
As I left she calls out see you friday. I am now thinking about what kind of payback I am gonna get.

[Snowden]

Oh, Beast, what a rascal you are! I do thoroughly enjoy these tales of yours.

I had T.P. for my neck, and the first couple ladies were bearable and what they did was ok for a few days after being there. Then they assigned this martinet, who read the rules set out for treating me and said she would do it her way. She damn near crippled me for a week. She would be fine taking care of college kids, but they should never turn her loose on us old folks!

I can't wait to hear about your young lady's payback! It should be fun for both of you.

(How do you rate a massage? They don't give them here - they put some electric tingly thing that drives me crazy -- far too short a trip for me, as I found out this past winter when things piled up on me!)

If I ever need T.P. again, it will not be the locals who do it.

[conlor]

Marianne, you had Toilet Paper for your neck? Is that a new kind of PT?

[Betty Boop]

I had PT for my frozen shoulder last fall. I am still totally convinced that if we the people really wanted world peace, we would let all the physical therapists loose on all the world's leaders - they' cave in no time. Physical therapy equals legalized (and well paid, I might add) torture!!!

But you know what, I do have all the range of motion back - in fact more in that shoulder than the contralateral one that was not frozen.

Still physical therapy or surgery - Pain or pain? Physical therapy wins out! Carry on with the perversion therapy, Beast - and yes, payback is a b*tch!

[Snowden]

Originally Posted by conlor

Marianne, you had Toilet Paper for your neck? Is that a new kind of PT?

Oh, blast! Thanks, Connie. Of course I meant P.T., but TP comes so naturally to us TrackPads ladies!

[satin_patriot]

I just thought you were saying it the fancy pseudo-French way-- Therapie Physicale

[m60-gunner]

If you hear a electrical crackle, or if the lights dim, or even if you hear a large condenser charging up, RUN, RUN FAST, RUN FAR.