NASCAR: "Races" now to be called "Games"

In keeping with the announcement of NASCAR's new playoff series designed to
compete with football on TV, NASCAR has just announced that from now on
"races" will be called "games", "tracks" will be called "fields"and "pit
road" will be called "the locker room".

Games (races) will be divided into quarters. If there are 400 laps in a game
(race) there will be 4 100 lap quarters. Further the game (race) will be
subdivided into halves. Each half will be made up of two quarters.

At the start of the second half of the NASCAR Nextel Game all action on the
field (track) will be stopped. There will be onfield (track) pageantry
including marching bands, cheerleaders and fan contests. This will be known
as the halftime period. While the festivities on the field (track) are going
on the teams will meeet in the locker room (pits)

At the end of the halftime period the cars (may consider changing that to
"players") will line up on the NASCAR field (track) facing the opposite
direction from that in which the game (race) was started. Thus Turn 4 will
become Turn 1, Turn 3 will become Turn 2 and so on. This will negate any
advantage due to wind.

The first player (race car) across the "Goal Line"" (Finish Line) at the end
of 4 quarters will be declared the winner unless a NASCAR official throws a
flag on the field (track) during the last lap. If that occurs the Game
(Race) will go into an Overtime Period. We hope this will not be a "Sudden
Death" overtime period.

That is all.
For now.
--
-v-
Only 8 !

"Greg Eglinton" <gjeglint@NoSpam_.ix.netcom.com> wrote in message
news:4000B226.D4439FE2@NoSpam_.ix.netcom.com...
>
>
> -v- wrote:
>
> >
> > That is all.
> > For now.
>
> How is the tag team thing going to work?

First we will get a big steel cage.
Then..........
--
-v-
Only 8 !

MR wrote:
> On Sat, 10 Jan 2004 13:21:54 -0500, "Robert R Kircher, Jr."
> <rrkircher@hotmail.com> wrote:
>
>> -v- wrote:
>>> In keeping with the announcement of NASCAR's new playoff series
<snippage>
>> As an alternative, we could
>> see a network official down on the field with large orange gloves
>> used to signal the Head Official (flag man) when it was time for
>> network commercials. At that time the Head Official would through a
>> yellow flag for the prescribed 3 minutes of commercials.
> Oooohhh ! I like the reversing direction idea! What fun on pit road!
>
It would be a hoot on the road courses.

Z

"Greg Eglinton" <gjeglint@NoSpam_.ix.netcom.com> wrote in message
news:4000B226.D4439FE2@NoSpam_.ix.netcom.com...
>
>
> -v- wrote:
>
> >
> > That is all.
> > For now.
>
> How is the tag team thing going to work?

NASCAR 's future:
http://jmp.buffnet.net/football.htm

$1 to Krusty
--
-v-
Only 8 !

-v- wrote:

> "Greg Eglinton" <gjeglint@NoSpam_.ix.netcom.com> wrote in message
> >
> >
> > -v- wrote:
> >
> > >
> > > That is all.
> > > For now.
> >
> > How is the tag team thing going to work?
>
> NASCAR 's future:
> http://jmp.buffnet.net/football.htm
>
> $1 to Krusty

I saw that -v-. Absolutely hilarious.

Gerg
--
My Ride
http://www.southwestcruizers.com/Gregs33/index.html

"-v-" wrote ...
>
>
> I agree. The officials should wear black and white striped shirts too.
> --


Won't B&W stripes make Mike Helton look fat?

"WildWeasel" <wweasel_24@HooYah.com> wrote in message
news:UNadnXCXPL8KMJ_dUSdV9g@ptd.net...
>
> "-v-" wrote ...
> >
> >
> > I agree. The officials should wear black and white striped shirts too.
> > --
>
>
> Won't B&W stripes make Mike Helton look fat?
>
>
>
No. Vertical stripes tend to thin.
--
-v-
Only 8 !